New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Randomize