I am officially superior to you. I said "Go Go Gadget Dick" before I fucked her. I dare you to beat that.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
