Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize
