We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
