The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I just gargled with NyQuil
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
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