we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
