After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
woke up with peach flovored chap stick on my taint ! dont ask why i know it was peach
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
