I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I had to rip your toilet paper for you...
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
