I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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