Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
When did angry sex become our thing?
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
Randomize
