I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
