Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
