I showed him my bush... on skype.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Randomize
