It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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