My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
About to throw up, bathroom line up, Bro sees me. Yells, 'PUKER GET OUT OF WAY' THEY ALL PARTED WAY THREW ME INTO A STALL AND CHEERED AS I THREW UP INTO THE TOILET. we are going back
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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