JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize