Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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