I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
And I broke things off with Justin last night. Except I texted him while he was asleep and then I was like well, that's probably not what he wants to wake up to, so I sent him a picture of the coconut I microwaved and caught on fire when I was really high one time.
Randomize
