I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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