I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize
