Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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