note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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