You're earring is so big in my mouth
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
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