I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
Randomize