so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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