Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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