is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
my boss said she was surprised to see me this morning. i told her there's a time in a girls life she has to give up day drinking in order to make money for next weekend's alcohol. she looked so proud, i think i might get a raise.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Trust me, dating 38 and 20 year old dudes at the same time is the best. Money plus all of the sex. Finally figured out this relationship thing.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Randomize
