You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
you never un-have a 4some
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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