what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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