Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
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