is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
only you would photoshop your dick
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Randomize
