I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Randomize
