It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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