we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize