I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
NoShamevember. You game?
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
it's a rainbow of FUCK YOU
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
