so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
Dude I may be rolling but there's no way I can make up a 12 ft tall giant green man waving to me right now
False alarm, security just told me it's a radio tower
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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