So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
I just gift wrapped bread.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Randomize
