bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
I need moral support for this bender
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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