real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
