shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize
