chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
