Yo, my girl thinks she's pregnant, so I've got a DD for the wedding. Sweet.
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I forgot wine drunk hurts
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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