I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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