; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Randomize
