I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize