I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
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