Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
Last night I had a dream that I changed my last name to Vodka. what does that say about my life?
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
