I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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