Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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