she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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