I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
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