Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
